Monday, February 15, 2010

Swimming with the Change of Tides...

Way back in the summer of 2007, I "jumped in" and decided to pursue my dream (or hunch, as that's all it was then) of art. I had resigned from my 9 to 5 job and was about to take my first art class EVER. (Yes. Ever. I didn't even take art in high school!) So, I was nervous and giddy and basically felt as though I was jumping into the ocean head first--and I was excited about it but also very afraid. I used this fear to guide me; I listened to the Universe and to myself.

Flash forward to now...I've been in"art school" for a few years now. I have learned A LOT. I have cried, I have smiled, I have questioned my sanity, my talent, and my decisions a million times. I hopped on one foot and poured my soul out into my work. And, this May I will be graduating. Though I'm excited about this, I also know that my art schooling is not over. I know I will continue to take classes, to explore, and to learn.

To quote from an Augist 2007 post, "So, today is the day I jump in! And, let me tell you: it was not an easy decision and there were some roadblocks and I definitely cried today when it seemed that it might not work out--but I think it has.

Today is the day that I quiet the voice in the back of my mind that tells me to "play it safe," the voice that says stay in the boat or on the dock. Today I get up off the beach and dive head first into the biggest wave. I will listen to my intuition. So I'll have to be living in the moment. The only voices I will “shhh” are the ones of doubt, insecurity and intimidation. It's so scary that I get goosebumps and I don't want to think about it...Ahhh, goosebumps. How telling are those? My body knows the answer before I realize it. My body is me showing me that I have the energy for undertaking my dreams. Goosebumps are chilling in a way that forces you to move. Rather than running away I will run with my arms open toward what I probably always knew was the right path. These are the omens we deny ourselves everyday. This is my Personal Legend that I have been too afraid to face. Failure be damned, I've known how to swim my whole life. "

Now I see that I have learned to become a stronger swimmer. The water-wings are all but gone. Since then I have determined that I know I "can swim through every change of tide." That as the end approaches I can see new beginnings--somewhere on the horizon the Universe waits.